bash.org

Slimtoad20: US Airways flight 404 is flying through the Bermuda Triangle today.
Slimtoad20: Yeah, that one doesn't stand a chance.





<+Scott> I had my dreams crushed yesterday. It turns out the newspaper headline "Village still looking for paedophile" wasn't a vacancy.





Crevan Hill says: I used the phrase "tight as a twelve year old" today...
Crevan Hill says: In the middle of class, when talking about how tight you should roll newspapers around dowels
Crevan Hill says: .....the teacher said ladies were present, and I apologized, with the qualifier that "I didn't necessarily mean girls..."






You know, the only good thing about Vista
Is that even the viruses have compatibility issues.







man, the way I wanna die is as an old man getting a heart attack from the excitement of having two 18-year olds riding me
wtf man, might as well go with 14 year olds. you're gunna die anyway!







some of my friends were smoking pot in a car. After some laughing they started to cruise around town. Drove for a while and while going round a roundabout one of them noticed that it would be funny to drive on it backwards. It was funny until the inevitable happened and they've hit another car.
lol
w8 there's more. They went silent and just sit frightened in the car. Police came very quickly and started to talk to the driver in the car behind them. Then the policeman came to their drivers door, my friend opens the window, and the policeman goes "don't worry guys, the bloke in the other car is so drunk, that he's telling stories you were driving backwards".







Last night, Helen and I were sitting in the living room, and I said to her, "I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug." She got up, unplugged the TV, and threw out my beer.
She's such a bitch.